It is sometimes hard to read signals from people of the opposite sex.
This girl that I have been out with was at the same function as me last night. I was getting some fairly negative signals.
Then, when we were together in annother social setting today, I was getting some serious positive signals.
What gives?
-Bob
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Rocky Mountain Raceways
Can I just say that RMR, while a fun place to go in general, does not translate into a good place for a first date.
It's too loud for conversation.
-Bob
It's too loud for conversation.
-Bob
Saturday, April 22, 2006
Regrets
Clear back last December, I went on a date with someone we'll call "Operation Independence." We had fun, an enjoyable time. But then something happened.
I never called her for a second date.
I wanted too, sure. However, I didn't. Time passed, and I forgot about it.
Then, I saw her at work last night. For the entire night, she was all I could think about.
That hasn't happened for a long time. Thinking about what might have been.
Someone's getting a phone call from me.
-Bob
I never called her for a second date.
I wanted too, sure. However, I didn't. Time passed, and I forgot about it.
Then, I saw her at work last night. For the entire night, she was all I could think about.
That hasn't happened for a long time. Thinking about what might have been.
Someone's getting a phone call from me.
-Bob
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Phonitis
Years ago, I was having a conversation with a female friend of mine who was having guy trouble.
The trouble was that the guy wasn't calling her.
It's a problem that I think may come from genetics. It doesn't matter whether it's calling to ask for a date, calling after a date, or just calling to say hi, we guys seem to have a problem.
It's a problem that frustrates the girls, which then frustrates the guys.
What can be done?
-Bob
The trouble was that the guy wasn't calling her.
It's a problem that I think may come from genetics. It doesn't matter whether it's calling to ask for a date, calling after a date, or just calling to say hi, we guys seem to have a problem.
It's a problem that frustrates the girls, which then frustrates the guys.
What can be done?
-Bob
Monday, April 10, 2006
Refreshing honesty
Today I was talking to a friend of mine. I told her that I had thought about asking her out and asked whether she would like to do that. She told me that she didn't see it as being much of a good fit.
First off, this is refreshing because I would much prefer that she tell me directly that she doesn't see much of a match. Second, I'm not surprised. However, this is preferable to going out and then having one more person in the world who can no longer be at ease in a conversation with me.
I have maintained and will continue to maintain that I am a very unique individual. The thing that can make that hard is that most people just don't understand me. This makes it hard to relate to those people.
It's nice that I had someone remove herself from the running early. I need to find someone who can appreciate full, undiluted Shaun. I'll look high and low, try the likely and unlikely, or even go to the curious and odd. Eventually I'll find someone who can appreciate the nerd that I am and when I meet that person I'm sure it will raise more questions than it answers and strange things will always be afoot.
Shaun
First off, this is refreshing because I would much prefer that she tell me directly that she doesn't see much of a match. Second, I'm not surprised. However, this is preferable to going out and then having one more person in the world who can no longer be at ease in a conversation with me.
I have maintained and will continue to maintain that I am a very unique individual. The thing that can make that hard is that most people just don't understand me. This makes it hard to relate to those people.
It's nice that I had someone remove herself from the running early. I need to find someone who can appreciate full, undiluted Shaun. I'll look high and low, try the likely and unlikely, or even go to the curious and odd. Eventually I'll find someone who can appreciate the nerd that I am and when I meet that person I'm sure it will raise more questions than it answers and strange things will always be afoot.
Shaun
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Dating Moratoriums
Have you ever felt the need to stop dating for a while? I decided to do just that back in November. I decided to start dating again a month ago and just haven't done anything. You can read about it in my Dating Moratorium post in my other blog. I think it has served the purpose I was hoping it would.
I wanted to do a reset on my dating life. The theory is that if you stop trying to date for a while and completely free yourself of thoughts of dating you can spend more time on thinking about whether or not you're in a good position to be dating in the first place. I still had some trouble sticking to my decision to not date. I guess I can stop dating, but never stop finding women interesting.
At this time I'm thinking about asking someone out and I'm actually thinking about things like whether or not this is a good time for her. I'm now able to consider the feelings of the other person involved. Now all I need is to be sensitive to those feelings. I think this is an important step.
Relationships are not meant to fix emotional pain. They can't do that. They are best enjoyed by people who already have their lives worked out enough to be OK on their own.
There's one more key thing I've learned in this. Cultivate friendships in order to prepare for more intimate relationships. It's just a matter of depth. Close relationships can be like swimming in the deep end; it can be a mistake if you don't know what you're doing in the water in the first place.
Shaun
I wanted to do a reset on my dating life. The theory is that if you stop trying to date for a while and completely free yourself of thoughts of dating you can spend more time on thinking about whether or not you're in a good position to be dating in the first place. I still had some trouble sticking to my decision to not date. I guess I can stop dating, but never stop finding women interesting.
At this time I'm thinking about asking someone out and I'm actually thinking about things like whether or not this is a good time for her. I'm now able to consider the feelings of the other person involved. Now all I need is to be sensitive to those feelings. I think this is an important step.
Relationships are not meant to fix emotional pain. They can't do that. They are best enjoyed by people who already have their lives worked out enough to be OK on their own.
There's one more key thing I've learned in this. Cultivate friendships in order to prepare for more intimate relationships. It's just a matter of depth. Close relationships can be like swimming in the deep end; it can be a mistake if you don't know what you're doing in the water in the first place.
Shaun
Monday, February 27, 2006
The Shaun Kruger school of life long learning
Ever have a funny thought come to mind at 6:30 in the morning? It happens to me often enough. In fact this one came Sunday morning...
The Shaun Kruger School of Life Long Learning (SKSL3) is now taking applications for students wishing to get their MRS. Classes start every Friday between 6 and 7 PM. The curriculum includes field trips associated with the following classes:
Ok, So I'm a nerd. A nerd accepting applications...
Shaun
The Shaun Kruger School of Life Long Learning (SKSL3) is now taking applications for students wishing to get their MRS. Classes start every Friday between 6 and 7 PM. The curriculum includes field trips associated with the following classes:
- Dinner 1010
- Dancing 1030
- Family Parties 2010
- Road tripping 2040 (elective)
- Engagement 3060
- Church activities 1020
- Summer recreation 2030
Ok, So I'm a nerd. A nerd accepting applications...
Shaun
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
27
27 (twenty-seven) is the natural number following 26 and preceding 28. Twenty-seven is the smallest positive integer requiring four syllables to name in English
Twenty-seven is also:
~The atomic number of cobalt.
~The total number of books in the New Testament of the Holy Bible.
~The number of letters in the Spanish alphabet
~The current number of Amendments to the United States Constitution.
~The age in years at which musicians Robert Johnson, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, Kristen Pfaff, Chris Bell, Brian Jones, Janis Joplin and Kurt Cobain died. Occasionally, this is termed the ideal age to die, and in fact the concept is so famous that it has inspired a brand of clothing, Dead.At.27.
~The code for international direct-dialed phone calls to South Africa.
~"Weird Al" Yankovic hides the number 27 somewhere in many of his songs and videos.
~With the number 37, a key number in comedian Charles Fleischer's concept of moleeds.
~I-27 is the designation for a US interstate highway in Texas.
~US 27 is the designation of a highway from Fort Wayne, Indiana to Miami, Florida.
~The number of completed, numbered piano concertos of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
~As of 12:57 this morning, my age, in years.
(source: Wikipedia for all but the last, which is found here at Wikipedia....)
Yes, folks, today is my birhtday. Annother year has come and gone. I didn't really have a tough time with being annother year older, until about a week ago. I suddenly remembered that one of my favorite teachers, Chip Hopkins, turned 27 while I was his student. He gave us a lecture about all the musicians who died at 27. to a 15/16 year old, 27 is, well, old.
It's not so old, anymore.
-Bob
Twenty-seven is also:
~The atomic number of cobalt.
~The total number of books in the New Testament of the Holy Bible.
~The number of letters in the Spanish alphabet
~The current number of Amendments to the United States Constitution.
~The age in years at which musicians Robert Johnson, Jim Morrison, Jimi Hendrix, Kristen Pfaff, Chris Bell, Brian Jones, Janis Joplin and Kurt Cobain died. Occasionally, this is termed the ideal age to die, and in fact the concept is so famous that it has inspired a brand of clothing, Dead.At.27.
~The code for international direct-dialed phone calls to South Africa.
~"Weird Al" Yankovic hides the number 27 somewhere in many of his songs and videos.
~With the number 37, a key number in comedian Charles Fleischer's concept of moleeds.
~I-27 is the designation for a US interstate highway in Texas.
~US 27 is the designation of a highway from Fort Wayne, Indiana to Miami, Florida.
~The number of completed, numbered piano concertos of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
~As of 12:57 this morning, my age, in years.
(source: Wikipedia for all but the last, which is found here at Wikipedia....)
Yes, folks, today is my birhtday. Annother year has come and gone. I didn't really have a tough time with being annother year older, until about a week ago. I suddenly remembered that one of my favorite teachers, Chip Hopkins, turned 27 while I was his student. He gave us a lecture about all the musicians who died at 27. to a 15/16 year old, 27 is, well, old.
It's not so old, anymore.
-Bob
Saturday, February 04, 2006
Interested? What's that?
Occasionally I wonder if someone I am talking to is interested in going on a date. I know people like to say things like "Just ask", but lets take a serious look at what goes wrong with this.
First, let me say that it is all too common for people today to equate going a date with having to form some kind of commitment. In fact, Mr Darcy in Pride and Prejudice near the end of chapter 6 observes "A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony, in a moment." This is often true for both men and women.
Many of us are constantly sizing everyone else up for whether they would be good husbands or wives and never stopping to consider if we have enough information to even consider the matter. We are also experts on what everyone else should be doing. (I think this is because we don't have to worry about any of the feelings involved in living through others.)
What does it mean to be interested? What does it mean to like someone? How does that become love?
If I knew these answers I would probably be actively dating. The trouble is that I find various women I know attractive and find them enjoyable to talk to. I would dare say these are my two basic criteria for wanting to go on a date. If we consider this seriously how much more can we expect to round down before going on a date? Further investigation is the purpose of a date. Last week I was talking to Bob and I said, "Dating seems to be the process of doing due diligence before selecting a permanent roommate".
Before I go on I would like to offer a slight explanation that would help illustrate where some of my trouble on this and other topics comes from. When I came home early off of my mission it was determined that I had Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not otherwise specified. The best explanation I can offer is that while many people find social interaction something that comes easily I have to make a specific study to figure it out. There was once a time when I couldn't even tell I had done something that bothered others or made them uncomfortable.
By this I will have to assume that "Just Ask" doesn't work because there is still something I'm missing. Then again, I really just see dating as two people trying out for a team. Each one can cut the other at any time. The trick is finding someone who is actually holding try outs.
What's to be done? I am doing pretty well at disregarding whether or not I would like to go on a date with someone. This does two things. I presently ask no one out. I also don't spend any time thinking whether I would like to go on a date with someone while talking to them. In a way this is very liberating and is for now allowing me to have more relaxed easier conversation with the women I know.
I guess I'll keep doing what I'm doing and wait for more mysteries to manifest themselves through patient observation. Until then I guess I'll have to go on some dates so I can continue the process of discovery. Besides, it's only dinner, I was hungry anyway.
Shaun
First, let me say that it is all too common for people today to equate going a date with having to form some kind of commitment. In fact, Mr Darcy in Pride and Prejudice near the end of chapter 6 observes "A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony, in a moment." This is often true for both men and women.
Many of us are constantly sizing everyone else up for whether they would be good husbands or wives and never stopping to consider if we have enough information to even consider the matter. We are also experts on what everyone else should be doing. (I think this is because we don't have to worry about any of the feelings involved in living through others.)
What does it mean to be interested? What does it mean to like someone? How does that become love?
If I knew these answers I would probably be actively dating. The trouble is that I find various women I know attractive and find them enjoyable to talk to. I would dare say these are my two basic criteria for wanting to go on a date. If we consider this seriously how much more can we expect to round down before going on a date? Further investigation is the purpose of a date. Last week I was talking to Bob and I said, "Dating seems to be the process of doing due diligence before selecting a permanent roommate".
Before I go on I would like to offer a slight explanation that would help illustrate where some of my trouble on this and other topics comes from. When I came home early off of my mission it was determined that I had Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not otherwise specified. The best explanation I can offer is that while many people find social interaction something that comes easily I have to make a specific study to figure it out. There was once a time when I couldn't even tell I had done something that bothered others or made them uncomfortable.
By this I will have to assume that "Just Ask" doesn't work because there is still something I'm missing. Then again, I really just see dating as two people trying out for a team. Each one can cut the other at any time. The trick is finding someone who is actually holding try outs.
What's to be done? I am doing pretty well at disregarding whether or not I would like to go on a date with someone. This does two things. I presently ask no one out. I also don't spend any time thinking whether I would like to go on a date with someone while talking to them. In a way this is very liberating and is for now allowing me to have more relaxed easier conversation with the women I know.
I guess I'll keep doing what I'm doing and wait for more mysteries to manifest themselves through patient observation. Until then I guess I'll have to go on some dates so I can continue the process of discovery. Besides, it's only dinner, I was hungry anyway.
Shaun
chick flick redux
(Re-written Monday, February 6)
OK, so on Saturday, I wrote a post. Then when Shaun posted, Mine disappeared for some reason. I don't know why, but I'm poting this back in it's proper slot, in hopes Shaun's doesn't disappear. If it does, I've got a backup.
Well, the post was about how I am a sucker for chick flicks. Yes, I am man enough to admit it. I even admit that I have been known to cry at times.
That being said, some men need to be tricked into seeing chick flicks. So, I found this trailer that maybe you can use to sucker that guy into seeing Sleepless in Seattle.
Enjoy!
-Bob
OK, so on Saturday, I wrote a post. Then when Shaun posted, Mine disappeared for some reason. I don't know why, but I'm poting this back in it's proper slot, in hopes Shaun's doesn't disappear. If it does, I've got a backup.
Well, the post was about how I am a sucker for chick flicks. Yes, I am man enough to admit it. I even admit that I have been known to cry at times.
That being said, some men need to be tricked into seeing chick flicks. So, I found this trailer that maybe you can use to sucker that guy into seeing Sleepless in Seattle.
Enjoy!
-Bob
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